Diary of the Nincompoop


Hello, may I introduce myself. My name is Sandwich the nincompoop. I’m 17 and i still haven’t proved my friends that I’m not a nincompoop. I study year seventeen books (I drew a seven next to the one. I actually study on 11+ Year 1 book.) I is am nearly in university but my grammar is not consistent enough to go to a normal high school. Instead, I went to a horrendous old grammar school. OK, I was just about to do a whole lot of diagrams about the school but it would take some time. Beside that, I like to play Loomian Legacy on Roblox.

Anyways let’s get on with the day.


Today is a very sunny very rainy day I started with breakfast. Then my teeth, then Loomian Legacy, then… am I rushing??? Okay, let me start again.

Sunday, again

OK, here it goes, I woke up and I ate toast smothered with jam. Then I decided if it’s time to play games. I played video games on my computer till 5 o’clock. Mum started shouting at me until I said” video games are good for you.” Then there was one more sentence till it was silent.

She grounded me. At least I have an apple, but won’t be enough to survive a whole week. I at least have a phone. Sadly there is no charger in my room and the phone is dead. I sneaked downstairs and ducked under the table to get the phone charger and ran upstairs. I was ready to be grounded for now…

Grounded Monday

It was a school day and I got to meet my friends and finally got out of the room. First topic was math. My teacher was screaming like a pig that got his tail chopped off and absolutely everyone got detention except an ant that was lurking around near the window.

Then we learnt about drugs. The teacher told me to say something about drugs until I said drugs are good. There was a huge gasp. The teacher gave me detention again and then I had to take an extra hour practicing how to say ‘drugs’ and learn that drugs are bad for you. But the thing is that I’m still not convinced that drugs are bad for you…

At the end of the day, I gave a slip that said you son thinks drugs are good. Another week of being grounded…

Grounded Tuesday

Again, I got to get out of the room. This time, school was not the same, I has been bullied I got bullied all through the day. In math someone shouted out the phrase ‘drug are good for you.’ then Mr Chair (the math teacher) asked who said that. Then everyone looked at me. I got detention for no reason. I didn’t even say “drugs are good for you”. Anyways, they are probably right. Drugs are bad for you. SO DON’T EAT DRUGS KIDS. If you are an adult sorry, I mistaken you as a kid…

Then during break, I took a little peek and I saw clearly something horrendous was going on. It wasn’t that the slugs are eating my snowman up but it was Zach (the school bully) telling every single student and every single teacher that I said “drugs are good for you”. Luckily, it hasn’t been told to the principle, the head teacher or the deputy head.

In the grammar lesson, I is (my mum crossed that…) was minding my own business until the teacher said that I got top marks. Zach was second and said 1st the worst, 2nd the best. I mean, god… does god even exist??? Ok, I guess he is right. I am the worst. Like god. (Sorry, I keep on saying god…).

At home, I studied on some of my workbooks. But instead of doing their equations, I did my own. E.g. J+J=J*J or man plus woman equals a relationship.

Grounded Wednesday

My tree house is about to be built. Sadly, I cannot saw see it after the grounded thingy is done. Everything is going well at school, my teachers forgot about what I said, so did the older students and younger students. And what about Zach? Well… He got expelled after hitting his head on a tree. And remember… DRUGS ARE BAD FOR YOU!


Believe me, I’m a Londoner T-REX, I am six years old but thin as a big leafy tree. My hobbies are reading and playing with toys, especially my friend REXY, and also I like playing Lego.
I would like to share some of my favourite stories that I have written in Bubblebee, and I hope you find it funny. Please write some stories and share them to this website. I know all about dinosaurs and Jurassic world, that’s why in the future, I would like to write some more stories about dinosaurs.
Here are some of my favorite stories: Dino Cove, Roald Dahl and other dinosaur books!!! At school I am so so so so so good at maths, that why my teacher calls me a mathematician!! By the way, you can check out some of my videos on YouTube called ‘S.O.K Channel’. Enjoy ^_^

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